What Not to Wear

I confess, on Sunday afternoon I was sitting lazily reclining in my living room, barely awake. An episode of "What Not to Wear" with Stacey London and Clinton Kelly came on; you know TLC TV's show where radical wardrobe transformations happen. Suddenly something caught my attention and I woke up.

As I started watching in earnest, my chair went from reclining to upright. I needed a better viewing angle. This show featured a 30-something mom, Amanda, who is an at-home-blogger. The at-home blogger description sounds like a perfect scenario for someone who's staging a clothing style revolt, right? This What Not to Wear candidate leisurely spends her day in over-sized T-shirts and sweat pants.  Sounds comfortably okay, right?

If I told you that fashion and dyslexia have similarities would you argue with me? As I began watching the show that's all I could think about...the similarities of the two.

If you know someone in need of a complete fashion transformation and you are willing to help make it happen, submit an application and recent photos to nominate her as soon as possible...

That's from an online page for getting people on the What Not to Wear show; but check out those words, "complete fashion transformation." Transformation.  Now that's what I'm talking about!

Here's a link to listen to the pronunciation of Transformation (listening to the correct pronunciation can be helpful for dyslexics who can mix-up the sounds of trigger words.)  http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/transformation

             Here's one definition of transformation:

1. A marked change in appearance or character, especially one for the better.

As to transformation, here's where it happens: hiding behind the clothes is a mom doing what she loves -writing.  At the same time this woman feels something's missing.  On the outside she wears a sign which is a phony smile plastered over her true feelings -those are her words.

In her writing she jots down little quips that send out jabs.  Phrases like "I'm the dumb mom," and "I don't feel like a grown-up" fill her mind and her blog pages. On the outside she sticks to the persona of a writer; she's a blog conferences speaker and successful in her own right. On the inside it's not enough.

Not even Stacey and Clinton will tell you that clothes are all you need. In my business where the clay is like the clothes someone might hide behind there's more to it. It's more than the mental tools and theories that we trust in...it's about what's deep within our soul. 

What Not to Wear candidates have no idea their fashion choices are connected to self-esteem. My clients usually have no idea that clay therapy has the power to change how we feel about ourselves. But it happens.

Stacey and Clinton spent a week guiding Amanda down the friendly fashion path. In the end they equipped her for real life back home. Yes, she learned fashion rules and spent $5,000 on brand new clothes, but it was more than the money or the material goods; it was a transformation.

"I feel like I have more control over my live", she said, after the make-over week. 

"Now I'm the real Amanda". 

What have you worked hard to cover up (poor handwriting skills, difficulty reading out-loud, lousy spelling....) Check out the these 37 Common Traits of Adult Dyslexia

http://www.dyslexia.com/library/adult-symptoms.htm

Need help navigating all of this? Give us a call at 573-819-6010 or email us at onpointlearning@yahoo.com

What Not to Wear link: http://tlc.howstuffworks.com/tv/what-not-to-wear
 

Finding the GENIUS inside those kids who like to talk back!

In the beginning, sometime after I began drawing landscape plans when I was about 5 years old, to the time I started working in a greenhouse in high school, I had a saying: I like working with plants because they don't talk back!

Not sure where that phrase came from because other than having a very talkative little sister I had no real experience with "talking back."

So to move out of the woods, where I'd been living with 100 year old mighty oak trees for 25 years has been a learning process for me. But now, in some crazy, stubborn, red-headed way (No, I DON'T have a temper to go with that red-hair; well, maybe a little bit!) my heart says: "you don't live in the country anymore, you can't still love the trees".  I know, it's just an emotional response; really I KNOW that.

But knowing something doesn't necessarily halt your imagination's super-power that makes crazy things seem real. Plus, remnants from the three-phased moving process from last year, I guess, are still in my mind adding to the mix.

When the seasons began to change last fall, my first seasonal change in my new house, I had a new  adjustment to city living. Literally. Without the canopy of old oaks covering my house's view of the sky it truly was a new beginning. Now I can see the maples.

The maple trees in my new neighborhood began drifting into hibernation last fall with an  outlandishly vibrant transformation. From green to scarlet, to crimson; to colors of red I felt like I'd never seen before.

It certainly wasn't the same as my life in the country but even a gal with an Ag degree can survive in the city. Right?  I could survive AND enjoy it!

I like kids who talk back!
When my children were young, without me even being conscious of the change, an encroachment for all things educational began it's movement. It overpowered my love for flora. I'll blame my children -their educations made me a junkie!

One day when my oldest daughter was in elementary school her teacher came to me with a concern.

Teacher: "I don't know what to do with her. She answers every question correctly on all the tests we've given."

Me: "Is there anything I can do to help?"

And she said?
The next day I was right back at the school.  Before I got 15 feet into the building I was directed into the principals office. (Fortunately, I loved that principal.)

(Through my whole school career, I'd only been in the principal's office once. That was in 4th grade. I was only a messenger for my dad. That terrified me!)

The principal quickly got to the point and said that my offer to help had alarmed the teacher. To this day I really don't understand why that was threatening, but it was.

The main point of our conversation should have been how to better meet the growing academic needs of my child -and to the principal's credit I always found her to be a good child advocate-but now I know there's so much more we can do.

But that was one of my experiences in the early days of converting from a "I like trees because the don't talk back" kind of gal to a "I love working with the kids that talk back."

In Monday's Columbia Tribune the editor, Hank Waters, had a saying at the end of his editorial that said:

To teach is to learn twice. 

I can teach you about trees; identify their genus and species, but what I truly love, more than my beloved oak and maple trees, is finding the GENIUS inside those kids who like to talk back! 



Trees beginning to turn to red this fall

It took an act of GOD
I lived in the woods for a quarter-of-a-century. Trees were my first love. I knew it would take an act of God to get me out of the woods.  And it did.

Trees have their own special way of exposing color, transposing the sunlight into a million shades and hues a human cannot re-create.

But I have a new love. Sunsets. For Christmas my daughter gave me some new chairs that fit perfectly into the small alcove in front of the high-arched window in my upstairs office. I've grown to love the view up there. It transforms me every time I walk into the room, as dusk approaches.  I look out at the twilight sky, sitting in my new chairs ... my goodness, it is breath taking.

My view is not from a majestic mountaintop or the shore at the mighty expanse of the ocean; nor from a vast desert or a beautiful city skyline -still it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Last night was not one of those nights where a spectacular scene unfolded. Most people probably drove on to their destinations totally unaware of the sky.

But they missed something.

The Stopping Point
It was mostly a dreary, gray-blue sky but as the time came for the sun to hit that certain point of the horizon, a vibrant orange-rose color shot up. It arched over the earth presenting a beautiful contrast to the events of the day and said: STOP.

The tufts of clouds higher up reminded me of a tie-dye fabric I'd once used for a Girl Scout project. But it was not a simple pattern. The formation moved along ever so slightly. Looking more closely, the contrast of the movement of the clouds to the lines of the window panes, I saw it was all moving so much faster than I'd expected.  I'll never look at the sky in the same way.

A few months of nightly watching the transition of late afternoon, to evening, to dusk, to night has changed me. Such beauty that's as multifaceted as our fingerprints or the patterns of a snowflake. Amazing.

And peaceful.

There's so Much More
As evening approached I had a call from a mom. She told me of the years she's searched for answers. Her son is smart, and works oh, so hard, but never seems to catch up in reading, writing.... She wonders what it's going to be like when he goes to middle school and the work gets tougher. And relationships become more complicated. He looks like a kid who is smart. Someone who should be able to get it but the teachers can't understand ... because after all, they're only teaching the same way they learned. If they learned this way, why can't he?

But as I looked at the gray winter sky at the end of a very cold day and saw the tie-dye tufts of fabric-puffed-up-sky floating along I thought to myself about the sky. Isn't it just a dark dreary night? No.

Even in the least likely of places, like the winter sky, there is such majestic beauty.

Forgive me for comparing a child to a bleak wintry sky because in the children we have a light that shines brighter than almost any other we could possibly know; our hope, our future and our promise.

But if you could only hear the voices of the parents who call me, seeking answers to their questions about the children that many have given up on, you would understand just what I'm talking about.

I know tomorrow, or maybe the day after, the sun will shine again. And I also know that there's all the reason in the world why the young man I just told you about can find the dawning of a new way of learning and life for himself.

A Little Mark Twain RESEARCH!

Research?

Recently I've read articles that detail how parents should deal with their child's IEP (Individual Education Plan -gives specific goals and measurements for a student's education.)

One article was geared toward parents of dyslexic children and had ideas about working with an IEP team. But there's something I'd like to clear up.  Often the IEP team members don't know they’re dealing with dyslexia. Most classroom teachers and special educators are not knowledgeable about dyslexia nor are they dyslexic therapists.

The discussions I read were mostly child centered but I didn't agree with this statement that was suggested for parents to follow: 

I would like my child to be taught using a research-based program that is directly responsive to his/her individual needs. Under IDEA and NCLB he/she should be taught by a highly-qualified teacher. I would like the curriculum you are using to be noted in the Notes section of the IEP, and I would like to see the research that indicates that this curriculum will be effective for my student. Furthermore, I would like evidence that the teacher has received training in teaching reading to students with dyslexia. I would like progress reports every month, and I will be sending someone to observe my student during specialized academic instruction.
 

I really have nothing against research-based methodology, I love research; but, what's actually behind the research is the real question. 

Mark Twain

In the 1990's I plunged into the upper levels of educational math -a foreign area to me- but Assistant Professor, Leslie Lukin, made the area of statistics come to life for me. 

I remember Dr. Lukin leading several discussions about the phrase "liars, damned liars, and statisticians", a quip originally made popular by writer Mark Twain. 

Just because something is research-based, and has statistics behind it, does not necessarily give it a golden-seal that magically makes it applicable. 

Where's the Research?

A website known as What Works Clearinghouse: Students with Learning Disabilities is backed by an unbiased and independent group who conduct thorough reviews of the current research literature and critically assess the evidence. They concluded: 

" ...well-established programs in use in many schools, including Orton-Gillingham based tutoring; Wilson Reading System, Alphabetic Phonics, and Barton Reading System... the traditional, phonics based instructional approaches to dyslexia that schools today are most likely to offer in an IEP, and that parents are most likely to request – are not supported by even a single scientific study that passes muster, according to the US agency in charge of evaluating such research."

Read that Statement Again

If parents continue looking for 'research-based' information without looking into the actual methods themselves, we have a problem.  If we use the information from the clearing house, trusting that their unbiased conclusions are saying the methods often found in the schools are not truly effective, where do we turn from there?  

If you aren't giving students in our schools tools that are actually working how can we show in an IEP setting that any of this is really working? 

Rounding Up

*I’ll never forget walking into Dr. Lukin's class on the final day of the semester for our educational measurement class. As I walked in the room and past her desk she whispered, < "I round up!". >  

What?  

"I round up...you scored 89.7% in the class." 

Ah, it seemed like an eternity passed but finally what she was hinting at made sense. My grade for the semester was an 'A' !*

Now, I don't know about the research behind Dr. Lukin's teaching but there was obviously something in her methods that worked for me!

Link to What Works Clearinghouse:

http://www.dyslegia.com/position-statements/position-statement-scientifically-based-research/


Link to the Davis Dyslexia methods: 
http://www.dyslexia.com/program.htm 

The Beautiful Face of Autism

In the News
When stories hit the news that talk about how real people deal with dyslexia and autism in their personal lives, it gives us a genuine perspective on what it means to live with these differences.

This week the story of Alexis Wineman, who will represent Montana in the Miss America pageant, has been a popular feature.

Ms. Wineman, who is 18 years old, is the youngest contestant in the pageant this year. That's not the only thing that separates her from the others competing for the title of Miss America: she's also autistic.  

In fact, she's the first contestant diagnosed with autism, to be part of the pageant.

"Diagnosed at 11, Wineman says she has "very mild symptoms," including melting down in stressful situations, occasional difficulty communicating and taking things literally. But she says these things are now a part of who she is and hopes her pageant appearance will help raise awareness for others coping with autism." 

Autism Diagnosis
Alexis' symptoms of -taking things too literally, -having melt downs in stressful situations, -needing time and tools to help her focus, are all part of why she was diagnosed with a pervasive developmental disorder and mild autism at the age of 11.

"for the longest time I just wanted to know what was wrong with me." 

This beauty queen says that diagnosis at age 11 came too late; a diagnosis at birth would have been better she feels. Regardless, her struggles lead her to feel that graduating from high school would never happen because of her difficulties with autism.

I can only speculate why she feels this label came too late for her, because, she's certainly reaching toward goals that not everyone obtains, like training herself for public speaking, putting herself into situations where quality competition and presentation skills are essential, plus having the self-assuredness that's required to be in the limelight; and now she's preparing to go to college. These are all things that say she's already taken great strides to be the best she can be.

But Alexis feels there's more. Now she's ready to show off her talents and skills, in front of a live audience and television viewers, where pose and sophistication will reign.  After tonight, regardless of the results of the pageant, she will continue to spread her message.

'Oops, wrong planet' has been used to talk about people who are on the autism spectrum but Miss Montana says she's just someone with a few differences, someone who wants to continue to change, and to become the best person she can be. Sounds like a goal anyone could have!

Here Are the Facts
"Most people do not understand what autism is." Wineman explains in her online finalist video.

"And one in 88 people having some form of autism -- this understanding is becoming more and more necessary "   -Alexis Wineman

For more information on the Davis Autism Approach: http://www.davisautism.com/what_daa.html

To read more about Alexis Wineman: http://www.examiner.com/article/miss-montana-coping-with-autism

The Past Year --#2

More about 2012
Welcome to the second installment of my 2012 year! Thanks for bearing with me as I explore how past events have impacted me.

The First Move
For almost two years my husband and I had uprooted ourselves from our home in the country to take care of my husband's mom, Yon.  She's had some medical difficulties, including strokes, and couldn't live on her own.  I'ts been difficult medically, and emotionally.

Our job was to encourage her to eat, exercise, and to have a little social interaction, all while increasing her strength and improving her health. That, by itself, was a full-time job! Anger, passive-aggressiveness and drama were the response. (And those are only my husband and my responses ... only kidding!)

Caring for someone is really no different from my work with my clients with learning differences. There's nothing I can really do unless they WANT my help. It's not about me, or how hard I want to help someone, they must be willing to change.

For Yon it personally isn't so much about what she wants.  It was about what she doesn't want. And, she doesn't want my help.

Different Perspectives
My mother-in-law is not a native American and her ideas can be quite different from mine. On the flip-side, this was the only time I've ever spent with her.  So as hard as it's been, this is the only time we've been together as a family. At least now I have some funny stories to tell. [Let's just say friends tell me in my next career I should do stand-up comedy using my YON material!]

Where's the part about dyslexia?
This is about dyslexia! From my perspective, this is about how someone with dyslexia has dealt with a difficult situation.  As a dyslexic there are traits that come about because of our natural way of dealing with the world. Another thing I'm susceptible to are environmental toxins.

That susceptibility increases as stress levels rise, environmental factors change...and even things like rearranging a room can affect some dyslexic people. I've found that under certain stressful circumstances I'm susceptible to a negative feeling from these factors, too.

Since I was born the list of things that bother me has changed from nylon, to wool; to cranberries, bleach, oranges, and things that I'm over-exposed to like...my mother-in-law's hair spray! The list changes from time to time as stresses come and go. [And to be fair, I'm sure I added my share of stresses to her life, as well!]

For me, all it took was a small whiff of her hair product, and I was in bed for days. At one point my husband threw her hair spray in the trash, she retrieved it....

Medically I know there are various ways to treat these difficulties but one thing I discovered were Epsom Salt baths. They helped me tremendously!
Read about the Davis Dyslexia 37 Common Traits of Dyslexia here:

Prone to ear infections; sensitive to foods, additives, and chemical products. Read more: http://www.dyslexia.com/library/symptoms.htm#ixzz2HJLuGPWR

The Second Move
Living with Yon came to an end one evening when her anger got the best of her.  It was late one evening, my husband and I were sitting on the couch intently watching a program we love when she came into the room. She immediately became extremely agitated because I was sitting down.

A daughter-in-law, from her perspective, should be working: cleaning, cooking, being a wife -all of the time. In her eyes I am a failure.  She let loose. We had to leave.

Remember, we'd uprooted ourselves from our home which meant now we were stuck in total limbo. Over the next few months we enacted our third phase of house hunting in the 'Yon Time Period'. I guess we can say that in 2012 my husband and I weren't planning on becoming expert house hunters, but ask our Realtor, we've made a pretty good stab at that title!

Sealed with a kiss, no, KISSES!

*Edit: Today, April 24, 2013 is the 106th anniversary of the opening of Hersheypark, founded by confectioner Milton S. Hershey for the exclusive use of his employees. Here it is today!http://www.hersheypark.com/map/index.php

Over the Christmas holidays I did some baking. I know, that's what a lot of people do during holidays, but baking isn't my gig anymore. Seems like a lifetime ago, when I was raising my four children, but back then I cooked three times a day, almost every day.

I cooked every day of every month: for decades! I cooked and prepared meals for babies, for growing children, for teenagers. I organized, planned, cooked, prepared, arranged, purchased, baked...for every holiday, every graduation, for scout events, church events, school events;  for everyone's birthday, made school lunches....whew! I could only take so much. Now my brain sends this warning message when it comes to any of that:

"Run, Cathy! Do. Not. Look back!"

But during the Christmas holiday I managed to escape that sharp warning message when the thought of baking cookies came to me. And since the baking thought rarely passes through that protective anti-baking shield I decided to do it up in a big way:  I bought a giant package of Hershey's Kisses designed to feed an army of royal children!

Since it is the beginning of a brand new year I decided that with baking a little rearranging in my baking cupboard was also in order. That's when something else hit me (besides the bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips!)

What hit me was a memory. The souvenir spoon that my daughter Amanda brought back from Hershey, PA for my mini-spoon collection when she was on a high school mission trip quickly came to mind. Retrieving the spoon with the miniature Hershey Kiss I thought: these Hershey's Kisses are truly unique!

Not only are they delicious, but Kisses, along with the milk-chocolate recipe, foil wrapping with the little plume, have survived for over 100 years as one of the most beloved treats in America.

However, there's more, much more about the Hershey Company than unique packaging and branding.

The Hershey's company was founded by Milton Hershey who early in life apprenticed for a chocolate maker. Hershey went on to start several more companies on his own...all of which quickly failed. Despite the ingenuity of his ideas, his first businesses just never seemed to take root.

But being the entrepreneurial that he was, he decided to attend the 1893 Columbian Exposition in Chicago. Happening upon a German chocolate company's display, Mr. Hershey promptly fell in love. So impressed with the German candy-making equipment he knew he had to have it and bought the entire display.  Before this Mr. Hershey's main product had been caramels, chocolate had been secondary to the caramels.  Suddenly chocolate was the deal!

Usually on these pages of my blog you'll find ideas and stories about dyslexia...and while nothing in Mr. Hershey's history states that he was dyslexic, the ingenuity of his ideas is really the important point here.  [Consider that he did poorly in school -though that could be attributed to the lack of stability his parents displayed in his youth. He seemed to inherit his father's genetic inclination for entrepreneurial tendencies.  All which can go hand-in-hand with dyslexia.]

No matter, the point is because one man did not give up, a brand, a city, a theme park and more continue to bear his name. Millions of dollars of profit have been made because of one man's dreams. Dreams he never gave up on.

Have you almost decided something was too tough to do? thought you could never accomplish it? gave up on?  Where could your dreams have taken you if you hadn't given up? A KISS is a simple confectionery concept that changed more than one person's life?

What can you use your entrepreneurial ideas to accomplish?

For more information on OnPoint Learning and Cathy Cook go to https://www.facebook.com/OnPointLearningCenter or www.onpointlearning.org